I've heard people speak of loved ones lost and say, I think about them every day, but I never knew that it was actually possible to think about someone gone from this world every single day, until losing you. It is literal, there has not been a single day in the last 13 years that I have not thought of you. I have become somewhat accustomed to the memories triggered by a song, a shooting star, a penny found, our bird flying over, or by a look or action by Brady & Emily that reminds me of you, but I am still taken by surprise so many times when you come into my thoughts without provocation, when you just suddenly appear in my mind, and I can see you, and hear you, and FEEL you are there. It is a connection I cannot describe, and the love I feel for you still, is the same as when you were here. It overwhelms me at times, because the reminders of that love, are also reminders of the loss. It is a fragile balance between the peace when I close my eyes and think of you, and live in my mind the love we shared, and the harsh truth, of opening my eyes, and knowing that you are not here. It truly is an unexplainable feeling being so incredibly connected to someone mentally and physically and then in an instant they are physically gone. That physical loss is excruciating, there is so much love and energy transferred in human touch, and your hugs and kisses were so incredibly powerful! I will never truly heal from losing that physical connection. What I have learned though, is that the mental connection doesn't stop with death. The heart and mind don't ever forget, and true love transcends the physical world. I know this for a fact, I am living it, and have for the last 13 years. I always loved your sneaked phone calls from work just to tell me you love me, your random sticky note messages, your kisses on my neck when I was doing dishes, your winks across the dinner table, and it is those random moments of love that are echoed now when you suddenly appear in my thoughts, I know in my heart it is you just checking in and sending your love, just as you did in the physical world. I know we are still spiritually connected, that our love is forever, I look forward to your surprise visits, and I know not a day will go by that I won't think of you.